I've always been anxious, but my last six months haven't been good...
One day at work I had this awful feeling of dread. Stomach was uncomfortable, was slightly dizzy and occasionally seeing stars...
But eventually went away...
But earlier this year and mostly at night, I'll get into bed and all of a sudden my head focuses purely on my heart and its rate. Problem is that more you worry, the faster the heart gets.
As the heart gets faster, you're worried you're going to die of a heart attack (and sometimes it feels like you will)...the first time, I had 2-3 panic climaxes in an hour and was considering getting up and asking the folks to drive me to hospital as I actually thought my heart was packing in...
But as I have had more, I realise that nothing has ever happened.
My last peak was some time ago, though several nights ago I think I averted another one.
I basically try to reassure myself that nothing is wrong, and it's my ******* mind trying to **** me about. Sorry about the language, but that is what it seems like. Once I reassure myself, I tend to even out...
Keep in mind, I don't smoke, drink excessively or do drugs, thought I do consider my extended family to be insane (Mum's side in actual fact)...
Now I have a constant tightness in my chest and throat, and I am sure that is due to tightness in my back etc. due to tension.
I play tennis and I have no problem breathing or maintaining fitness. I have hard my heart checked and my pressure only very slightly high, but that may also have been because I was nervous (I hate blood pressure machines)...
My biggest problem is my pulse. I check it all the time to make sure my heart is beating at a normal rate...but not as much as before. There was a time I would count 10 seconds and count how many heartbeats.
RIght now, I have the tightness in the throat and upper chest and I've had it for a bit...
I have noticed though that if I don't think about it, I don't even notice it and I feel fine...
I probably only really recognised my 'condition' a few months ago, but I sort of feel I'm in more control than before...
Well, it's been great sharing and certainly helpful for me. I hope others can gain at least one thing from what I've written, even if it is disjointed
