Civil Works - “Right Said Fred” Edition

[Citroënbender]

Council does first stormwater pit audit in my historical memory of the area. Nothing happens.

A year later, a rooster with fancy van turns up, shunts a camera up the pipes in each pit, writes up his report. Nothing happens.

Nine months later, infrastructure subcontract auditor comes around knocking, can I please move my car off the pit? I point out the pit’s all cracked from when the energy provider put their stabilisers out on the crane or borer for pole replacement. No problem he says, we’ll be doing something about it. I wasn’t fussed if they did or didn’t.

This week (some weeks later), a civil works crew turn up, can I please move Povo Ute off the pit? They explain they were sent to “repair the lintel” but immediately declare it’s beyond patching and rip it off “for safety”, thence calling the council’s stormwater engineer to get his posterior pitside, post-haste.

Engineer appears. Declares old pit not big enough, so not just a new lintel but a new pit. It grows twice in their discussions, eventually settling on 2x1m floor area. Subbies say “We’ll come back to this one tomorrow, it’s too big for today” and waste the next three hours on the council’s coin. They secure the site and shoot through, forgetting the tools they left on the footpath. I pick up the dropped toys and stash them out of view.

So this morning they dug halfway across the street to remove the old pit materials and resize the hole. Bit of mesh and concrete, another 90 minutes of not doing a whole lot afterwards (other than remembering their tools today).

Kind of looking forward to Wednesday’s instalment where they decide it all has to come up again for some reason. Nice enough chaps, not grubs who hoick and litter. I’m looking forward to getting my kerbside parking back but it’s not a huge issue.